Resolutions for 2016


I am so utterly thrilled to have come so far from 2013, and 2014. This practice of creating resolutions and trying to work within a growth model framework has been so indescribably important to me in trying to live well with depression, anxiety, and other things that I deal with. 

Body Image/Exercise/Healthy Living
similar goals as last year because they’re good and because I’ve been meeting most of them! A happy face beside each one I achieved, because rereading it this year actually made me smile as it’s something I have “figured out”  🙂

  • Food Goals:
    • Keep track of what foods I eat and eat 2-3 meals a day.
    • Eat a fruit in the morning as part of breakfast once a week – work up to every day
    • Drink more water! use the Loblaws-glass-bottle as a measure and consume  4 of these per day.
  • Exercise Goals:
    • Incorporate walking into every day –use the gym at work!
    • Work up to running for 30 minutes, 3 times a week
    • Lose 25 lbs -I wish I could get rid of this goal. But I need it to be there in some ways: Diabetes, hypertension,  and heart disease run in my family; there is a serious concern of me developing these issues from a genetic perspective – and lately, I have been developing a lot more of subq fat that worries me.  I want to feel lighter and fitter and not be so tired all the time moving around
    • Strength train for arms, core, and sides.
      • Start with simple stuff, using body weight, at home, work up to more intense exercises
      • develop a way to mark “health” goals – like feeling stronger, fitter, having more energy, being able to do more without feeling as fatigued
  • Writing/Planning Goals:
    • Write 3 articles per week and as many poems as needed
    • Keep a journal, and a pen, on hand at all times
    • Keep an agenda at all times to note down appointments, ongoing house/groceries list
    • Submit articles to online/print publications
  • Sleeping Goals:
    • Sleep at a regular time; when fluctations happen, seek to correct them with better sleep hygeine practices like:
      • lights off after 11pm
      • use soothing music if I have to
      • use melatonin if I have to
  • Body Loving Goals:
    • Relax my jaw more 🙂
    • Try to love my body more, whatever weight it’s at, and accept it
    • Work on corporal flexibility to strengthen mental flexibility – incorporate fluidity in how I live because water can’t break 🙂
    • De-stress every night through conscious loosening of tense muscles; identify and work on specific muscles that are tense 🙂
    • Continue to be aware of who affects my body and in which ways; listen to my body about how to respond to people – whether to approach them or stay away, whether to reach out or back away, and what to say. Remember that the words are already on my tongue – I just have to read them out loud without muddling from my brain or my ~feelfeels~ 🙂
    • Continue to be conscious of my posture 🙂
      • go for massages
  • Hair Goals:
    • be more diligent about oiling my hair at night -2-3 times a week
    • do not wash hair more than 2-3 times a week (this strips it and kills it)

Relationships/Self Image – I am truly stunned at how many of these I’ve met, excelled at, and really improved on this past year! A happy face beside each one I achieved, and am continuing to achieve! (two happy faces indicates that I’ve been “getting this” since 2014) 

  • Trust/love/accept myself more – trust others will too 🙂 🙂 and also push myself in kind, encouraging ways to continue to grow!
  • Be hopeful rather than skeptical 🙂 🙂 (I am actually so proud of achieving this goal – it has helped me tremendously in addressing my depression and anxiety. See:
    https://midsentencerevelation.wordpress.com/?s=balance
  • https://midsentencerevelation.wordpress.com/?s=hope)
  • Value myself more – trust others will too 🙂 🙂
    • What does this look like? It looks like listening to my own body about situations – unease in my belly or tears in my throat – or warm feelings of affection and wanting to reach out in my fingers
  • Express hurt before it’s too late…and value my own hurt for what it is rather than thinking I ‘shouldn’t’ be or don’t ‘deserve’ to feel the way I do. 🙂 🙂
  • Be open to resolving conflict in a way that works with everyone involved; meet people where they are at!
  • Continue deprioritising/decentering romantic love. 🙂 while also valuing other forms of love more
    • Once I gave up the “quest” to be seen as romantically loveable, I stopped struggling with extreme bouts of loneliness.  But I think I was confusing loneliness with some sense of lack of self worth which is thankfully being fixed, because instead of looking to be seen as loveable, I no longer see it as a measure of my self worth. 🙂 see: https://midsentencerevelation.wordpress.com/2015/08/04/on-the-radical-notion-of-being-romantically-unlovable/
      And this way of approaching loveability has been better for me and has actually made me cherish  good friendships, my own alone time, a lot more
    • enjoy and cherish my own time, and the time I invest in myself 🙂
  • Continue trusting my knowledge, abilities, capabilities more – and invest in these more! 🙂 🙂
  • Feel deeper
    • No. Horrible goal. REMOVING THIS GOAL. Emotional feelfeels are not really my key to understanding the world around me – they’re nice, and they’re important, but they’re not my go-to for making my life better. At best, they give me temporary like 4-min anxiety laced cuddly feels, and at worst, they give me straight on panic attacks. No thanks. (2014)
    • update: yeah this goal sucks forever. Feelings aren’t the miracle path for everyone – but I’m leaving it here because of the ways in which people are pressured into “valuing” their feelings all the time. No. This doesn’t work for everyone! 
  • Continue appreciating good friends more – and more often. 🙂
    • this includes showing care in the way they would like to receive care!
    • Continue maintaining ties with friends. 🙂
    • Build a “present” practice – be present for friends  in ways that show care, especially for those more marginalized than myself:
      • material support: cooking meals for them, helping them clean up their place, cash
      • emotional support: being there for them when they’d like some company, recognizing that they also have a lot to offer and may be shy so open that door more
      • crisis support:
      • presents. literally. around holiday times, if I can afford it, to show my love and appreciation for having them in my life and for existing.
  • Give people as many chances as feels “natural” or which meets my own internal equilibrium for an ‘even’ relationship. 
    • this used to be: “give people a second chance and no more” but I’m at a point where I can invest more in some people, gauge a situation better and with more nuance!
  • Approach people, life, and events from a “growth” model perspective 🙂
    • I am focusing so much on growth these days, of my self, of relationships.

Spiritual Goals – this is a new category I decided to add  based on my growth from last year, and practices I’ve started to adopt

  • Prioritise an attitude that centers equanimity when it comes to feelings: Value joy as much as sadness.
  • Recognise that the movement of events, feelings, people is part of the flow and balance of life.
  • Seek to appreciate the balance; do not cling to individual feelings or people. Open up to vulnerability, love, trust, and friendship with equal appreciation for what all of these can bring. 🙂
  • Move forward without looking back; accept the present
  • Remember why tamasic actions, beliefs, and intent rank ignorance and indifference as much as ill-will; there is a spiritual cost to inertia
    • Do not fetishise pain, my own or others
    • Love myself from a place of deep compassion that expects the best from myself and forgives myself when that is also not met – and love others from this place as well
  • Sit with feelings and accept them as simply an internal storm that will pass.
    • This approach to feelings has been much more calming for me. my feelings do not define my reality any more than anything else.
    • Pain can end just as quickly as joy if I let it
  • Work with the universe more
    • Continue being more giving, working harder, and being kinder
      • Give in ways that draws on the same Source when I give to myself
      • Focus on “L”ove and “S”elf more so than love and self.
  • Adopt a “gratitude” model
    • this prevents chasing after new experiences/goals in a way that disregards the present
    • being grateful for what I have allows me to envision a future where I will be grateful for what I have then; it is a model that respects the present
  • Start a meditation routine
    • revisit and incorporate visualisation techniques
    • Develop a way to welcome mornings, and to invite night as a way of accepting the day and its events at the end of every night
  • Begin a spell-book/ritual book to develop routines that structure the day

Personal and Professional Development Goals: Work/School/Volunteering/

  • Continue excelling at work
    • revamp my program
    • meet and excel at work-related targets
    • build community contacts and network efficiently and strategically
  • Volunteer with organizations that have similar political/social aims!
    • Canadian Blood Services
    • St Michael’s Research
    • Women’s Shelters
  • Retake MCAT
  • Write PCAT
  • Apply to SMP, MPH, med schools

 

 

 

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This entry was posted in Articles, Mental Health, Thoughts on Life, Uncategorized and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Resolutions for 2016

  1. ///So many/// good points on this list! I am going to be adopting many of them for my own Resolutions list. This made me have an “Ah hah!” moment: “incorporate fluidity in how I live because water can’t break.” I need more of this in my life. Genius. Thank you.

    Like

    • kshyama says:

      🙂 I’m glad they resonated and have given you ideas as well! I’ve grown a lot in my own practice of self care/doing the work since I started making the resolutions a few years ago!

      Like

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